I wasn't going to visit Aaron today but my sister in law wanted to see Aaron so I met her at the jail.
I mentioned to Aaron about trying to get into drug court for the wrong reasons was a guaranteed failure if he even made it in, because they will know during the evaluation if you are really "wanting" drug court or if you have other intentions. Aaron's other intention was, he is under the impression that it would possibly get his felonies dropped. He has since learned different. The really good news is that Aaron said if he doesn't get into drug court then he is going to go into rehab himself. I was never so relieved in my life when he told me that. I told him that I was so glad he has made that decision because I was going to tell him that he was not going to come home straight out of jail without rehab. He said that he has a lot of time to think and knows that he has to make changes in his life. I agreed and told him that he will most definitely need help to do that.
One more step forward in our new lives.
I hope he continues with his thoughts and his actions about getting clean. You remain in my thoughts and my prayers.
ReplyDeleteStumbled across your blog. So happy I did!
ReplyDeleteIm a recoving alcoholic/addict and I just want to say: However he gets into recovery, through jail, court, or on his own.....even if he gets into recovery for the "wrong" reasons.....the miracle of recovery can happen when he least expects it. :-)
I went to AA to keep my family happy (and quiet), so technically I went for the "wrong reasons.
The cool thing about Gods grace was it met me where I was at. That was 4 years ago.
I'll be praying for him. :-)
I'm glad to see that you are getting some very good comments. Experience is usually a wise teacher. I am part of "the club" too.
ReplyDeleteMy son, who is now 26 and into his 6th year of sobriety, began using drugs when he was a young teen. He became addicted to prescription drugs as well as street drugs and we had years of lying, anger, blame, stealing, etc. I can offer only one certainty here. It truly is up to us to choose whether we become addicted to our addicts and have their bad choices dictate our happiness and serenity. It is not a matter of love.
We need to make good choices for ourselves. During my son's rehabilitation he had a lot of guilt. He was grateful that in addition to his guilt about his addiction and the other lives he ruined in the process, he didn't have to feel guilty about ruining mine. You see, I achieved my own recovery to being addicted to him way before he found his own recovery. I can't say for sure that it had anything to do with his recovery, no one really knows, and most people decided I just didn't care and that I was a bad mom. It seemed to others that I was selfish when I stopped enabling and was learning how to say no. (It was really self care.)
I'm not sure if you are up to this, but I am offering relief and hope. From my own experience I can tell you there really are no absolute right or wrong ways to attack this. My rule, after my recovery began, was to do only what I felt was comfortable for me. It worked well for me.
I love my son and he loves me. He still "gives back" in his recovery community every day. I try to do the same for loved ones.
Feel free to visit my blog where I try to offer practical tools to use and some hope. Have a good day.